Well, I am back "home" this week in Phoenix to help out at Mary and Rick's. I haven't been able to be here for a few weeks so I am glad to be back.
Her fifth treatment was on May 6th. This started a four week plan of a different type of Chemo called Taxol. As we mentioned in previous posts, this drug's side effects were not supposed to be as bad as the Adriamycin. Well, lets just say....they're different.
She received her treatment on Monday 5/6 and other than being a bit tired that afternoon, she was feeling okay. Tuesday came, and I called her that afternoon to check in because she goes in for her Neulasta (boosts her white blood cells) shots on Tuesdays. She was actually feeling pretty good and was on her way to WalMart to do some grocery shopping. I didn't talk to her until Wednesday morning, but found out she only made it for about 20 minutes in WalMart before needing to head back home. It hit her like a rock fell on her! Her body started hurting so badly and she got so tired, she just couldn't finish. Wednesday when I was talking to her, she said she felt a little better, so I thought the pain was going to be manageable. Thursday morning when I called she said she was still "sore" but it sounded like she was doing okay. Well, Rick called me that evening and asked if I had spoken to Mary. I said I had and asked what was up? He told me she had been hurting so bad the last couple of days that getting up off the couch was almost impossible without help, and that even walking down the hall was painful for her. I was so mad that she had downplayed how she was feeling and that I wasn't able to be here to help out that week! I think it was finally Saturday or Sunday when she started feeling a bit better.
So, I knew I needed to be here for this next treatment. I flew in early Monday morning 5/20. Amber picked me up from the Airport and drove me straight to Mary's Chemo appointment. I got there around 8:30am and Mary and Rick had been there since 8am. They were waiting for her lab results. Every Chemo day they have to check her bloodwork to make sure her numbers are good enough for her to receive her treatment that day. They had a delay with another patient so Mary's treatment started late, and by the time she got the "go ahead" I think it was around 9:30. Before the Taxol actually goes in, she receives doses of a couple other meds. (anti-nausea, and a heavy does of Benedryl) The Benedryl makes her very sleepy, and she does fall in and out of a kind of hazy sleep during her treatment. Imagine sleeping in a huge room, with bright fluorescent lights on, 10 other patients, and beeping and alarms going off every 20-30 minutes? (explains her "hazy" sleep) I think we got out of there around 1:30. The good news she received before leaving was that because her white blood count looked so good, she will be able to skip the Neulasta shot she would normally have on Tuesday. (We were hoping this would cut down on her bone/joint pain.) Monday afternoon Mary felt pretty good. She was a bit tired but fought taking a little snooze so she could sleep that night, but other than that, was able to enjoy having Amber and Bentley over for the afternoon.
Tuesday, started out as a good day. Amber came over with Bentley and Mary was feeling pretty good. She felt stiff here and there and did need a nap in the afternoon. A very good friend (SHAUNA) brought over a very much appreciated and a very good meal for dinner. Before bed she did start feeling more stiff and sore but made it to bed without any meds. About 3:30am Rick knocked on my door and said Mary was up sick and so was Roxy. (Roxy is their dog. She had been not feeling good for the last week.) He was needing to take Roxy to the 24Hour Vet and needed me to listen and take care of Mary. She was up and down a couple more times before Rick got back home around 5:30. Mary was back in bed finally in and out of sleep. Roxy was tuckered out from her Vet visit and the shots she got there. Rick and I were wide awake. :) Mary got up (very slowly) around 8:45 with pretty bad stomach issues and very bad bone pains in her knees, hips, and back.
We are thinking it is going to be a hard day, but hopeful this will be the worst and then start getting better. (for both her and Roxy) If you are following this, please keep her in your prayers this week as it's not only hard physically but also mentally on her. Also for Rick. We forget about the caregiver so often, and he has been amazing here for Mary. It's very stressful on both of them, but for Rick who loves her and can do nothing but what he thinks will help, and do it when he still has to work and do everything else that needs to be done, it's pretty tough.
Thanks everyone for caring, loving, and praying. (and for the occasional meal)
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Sunday, May 5, 2013
4 More Treatments Left
It has been awhile since I have written, I have left it up to my sister, and what a great job she does!
The last 2 chemo treatments were not very easy by far! I was used to bouncing back the week after chemo and having at least one good week before having to think of it again and of being sick again for another week.
The week of my 3rd treatment, I was hit with such horrible acid reflux/indigestion, that I only had about 3 hours of sleep the night before chemo. By the time I got to chemo I was a little scared that there was something really wrong with me! It felt like someone had reached inside and had a fist hold on my liver, and I could barley catch my breath! My biggest concern was, man they are going to send me to the hospital, this is going to be stretched out longer, and now I have liver problems....YEP, your mind can play some real mind games with you!! The Dr. came in to see me and he said that it was just acid reflux. I started chewing Tums like candy, and it helped a little. By the end of that week they put me on a Rx for all the GI issues and relief was then knocking at my door. By Sunday I was looking forward to my "good week". By Wednesday, I had given up that my "good week" would happen, and my good friend Tracy was coming into town Thur!!! By Thursday afternoon, I felt good enough to go out for a few hours, and then Friday and Saturday I rallied for a few hours each day. All I did was go to restaurants so I could SIT. Shoot, Sunday was just around the corner, and that meant my Monday chemo was knocking at my door. I felt robbed of having at least ONE good week before getting hit again!!
Sunday came and gave me a great day. Rick's sister came into town to babysit me for the week. She is always a blast to be around and is very helpful! Sunday was spent with Rick's family and laughing alot! Monday came knocking to quick! It is ALL mental, and that is sometimes the hardest thing to battle. While the 4th and last chemo of the "Red Devil" (and no she doesn't wear Prada!) came, I found that while this time I wasn't hit with all the bad GI and nausea problems that I had the time before, I was still very, very tired! I joke to Rick about what I do...Hey, I did two loads of laundry, ran the dishwarsher :o) , and took a shower. But then had to rest for 2 hours!! I have gone from doing 5 million things to, hey I got to do one outing today!!
Chemo is a "funny" thing.....Let me tell you some of the strange/funny/cruel things that go through my head....I am on very heavy duty steroids, to help with the nausea, and what is it that I am worried about? Weight!! Yep. At my age I don't want to put on anymore weight, and yet that is what steroids do! Don't judge, I know I am supposed to be fighting for my life, but, I am "fighting like a girl", and we girls care about that!! Chemo robs you of so many things, like, your hair! It takes the hair off my head, making it like a neon sign pointing at me that says, "she has cancer, nah nah nah!!", but I am still having to shave my legs!! WTH!!! You go out for an outing (as I call my time out of the house) feeling good, and WHAM, you get bitch slapped and just want to sit on the couch--NOW! Chemo has stolen my self confidence. It is very hard for me to go anywhere alone. As long as I have my "little support" group with me I am ok, but alone takes a HUGH mental prep just to go out the door. (refer back to the neon sign comment) Yes I have had times I have come close to throwing in the towel and putting a stop to all of this! I am tired of my family and friends seeing me weak, and I am unable to be there for things I should be. It sucks, but I will push on and pray to NEVER have to go through anything like this again!!
I will tell you this, people need to lay off Lance Armstrong. So the guy lied. Yada yada yada. I will tell you this, NO AMOUNT of performance drugs gave him the will to fight his cancer! That was all him, and his own will, and mind over matter, that comes from deep inside a person!!! So LIVESTRONG!
So, I leave you with it being a new Sunday, and tomorrow being the start of a new type of chemo. I have been told that these next 4 treatments are not as tough on the system as the last 4. So, as I close, I look forward to "easier" chemo days! I love you all, and can't thank you ALL enough for the support you have given to me and my family! WE STAND IN AWE OF ALL THE LOVE!!!
The last 2 chemo treatments were not very easy by far! I was used to bouncing back the week after chemo and having at least one good week before having to think of it again and of being sick again for another week.
The week of my 3rd treatment, I was hit with such horrible acid reflux/indigestion, that I only had about 3 hours of sleep the night before chemo. By the time I got to chemo I was a little scared that there was something really wrong with me! It felt like someone had reached inside and had a fist hold on my liver, and I could barley catch my breath! My biggest concern was, man they are going to send me to the hospital, this is going to be stretched out longer, and now I have liver problems....YEP, your mind can play some real mind games with you!! The Dr. came in to see me and he said that it was just acid reflux. I started chewing Tums like candy, and it helped a little. By the end of that week they put me on a Rx for all the GI issues and relief was then knocking at my door. By Sunday I was looking forward to my "good week". By Wednesday, I had given up that my "good week" would happen, and my good friend Tracy was coming into town Thur!!! By Thursday afternoon, I felt good enough to go out for a few hours, and then Friday and Saturday I rallied for a few hours each day. All I did was go to restaurants so I could SIT. Shoot, Sunday was just around the corner, and that meant my Monday chemo was knocking at my door. I felt robbed of having at least ONE good week before getting hit again!!
Sunday came and gave me a great day. Rick's sister came into town to babysit me for the week. She is always a blast to be around and is very helpful! Sunday was spent with Rick's family and laughing alot! Monday came knocking to quick! It is ALL mental, and that is sometimes the hardest thing to battle. While the 4th and last chemo of the "Red Devil" (and no she doesn't wear Prada!) came, I found that while this time I wasn't hit with all the bad GI and nausea problems that I had the time before, I was still very, very tired! I joke to Rick about what I do...Hey, I did two loads of laundry, ran the dishwarsher :o) , and took a shower. But then had to rest for 2 hours!! I have gone from doing 5 million things to, hey I got to do one outing today!!
Chemo is a "funny" thing.....Let me tell you some of the strange/funny/cruel things that go through my head....I am on very heavy duty steroids, to help with the nausea, and what is it that I am worried about? Weight!! Yep. At my age I don't want to put on anymore weight, and yet that is what steroids do! Don't judge, I know I am supposed to be fighting for my life, but, I am "fighting like a girl", and we girls care about that!! Chemo robs you of so many things, like, your hair! It takes the hair off my head, making it like a neon sign pointing at me that says, "she has cancer, nah nah nah!!", but I am still having to shave my legs!! WTH!!! You go out for an outing (as I call my time out of the house) feeling good, and WHAM, you get bitch slapped and just want to sit on the couch--NOW! Chemo has stolen my self confidence. It is very hard for me to go anywhere alone. As long as I have my "little support" group with me I am ok, but alone takes a HUGH mental prep just to go out the door. (refer back to the neon sign comment) Yes I have had times I have come close to throwing in the towel and putting a stop to all of this! I am tired of my family and friends seeing me weak, and I am unable to be there for things I should be. It sucks, but I will push on and pray to NEVER have to go through anything like this again!!
I will tell you this, people need to lay off Lance Armstrong. So the guy lied. Yada yada yada. I will tell you this, NO AMOUNT of performance drugs gave him the will to fight his cancer! That was all him, and his own will, and mind over matter, that comes from deep inside a person!!! So LIVESTRONG!
So, I leave you with it being a new Sunday, and tomorrow being the start of a new type of chemo. I have been told that these next 4 treatments are not as tough on the system as the last 4. So, as I close, I look forward to "easier" chemo days! I love you all, and can't thank you ALL enough for the support you have given to me and my family! WE STAND IN AWE OF ALL THE LOVE!!!
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